Welcome to Motherhood!

One of my friends was recently inducted into the great hall of motherhood. While I was so thrilled for her, and grateful the baby is healthy and doing well, there is a bit of me that feels a deep and serious compassion for her over the changes she’s going through.

She is at a time in her life to handle starting a family. Still, nothing can prepare a mother, or couple for the changes a new baby brings into their lives.

It can be really hard. You’ve heard that, huh?

A few days after coming home with my first baby, I suddenly thought, “what the heck has happened to my life?” Because it’s never, ever the same again.

Your previous life can be selfish, for the most part. You’re looking out for number one (and two, your husband). Now all the sudden you’re number THREE has become number ONE and it’s hard to take in.

Life is never going to be like it was before. But it can be even better!

That’s not an empty promise. I promise!

My life is busier and more hectic than it’s ever been before. I rarely have time to myself.

But I’ve never been happier, either. I know, it sounds strange, but it’s true.

I’m one that believes that forgetting yourself and serving others brings happiness. And no one serves more than mothers!

It’s perfectly normal to experience any and all of the following emotions during your first few days as a new mother (OK, I mean for the rest of your LIFE as a mom!). These are some of the feeling I first experienced anyway:

doubts about your abilities, emotional, happy, worried, anxiety, intense love, frustration, pain, sleeplessness, warmth, irritability, humility, greatly blessed

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and worried, I promise you, that things get better. You learn as you go.

No one expects you to be perfect from day one. Life’s about learning.

It’s always going to be hard, but it gets easier. Or rather, you get better at it.

While I was new at mothering, I was actually quite surprised at how many instinctive abilities and skills manifested themselves while taking care of my newborn baby.

I hadn’t perfected my skills yet, but I was surprised that I did know how to make this baby happy for the most part (that is, until colic hit).

My doubts about my inabilities did not and have not yet disappeared, but they shift to different focuses as I become more confident at one thing or another.

After I had my first baby, my mom traveled from three hours away to spend a few days helping us get settled in.

When she finally had to leave, I felt like falling to the floor, clinging to her ankles and screaming, “Please don’t go! You can’t leave me alone with him (the baby)!”

We both cried.

I cried for a couple of reasons. One, because I felt so grateful for the time she’d spent helping me. And two, because I felt so all alone at what I was facing.

Yes, I had my husband. He was wonderful and supportive in every way he could be. But he wasn’t a woman and he wasn’t my mom.

I think Mom cried because she was already at the end of what I was just beginning.

She knew there were lots of lessons and struggles and tears to come. And it was her baby she had to leave alone to face it all.

I think some of her tears were happy tears too.

She knew I now had the opportunity to love and serve someone completely unconditionally. She knew I would be learning the true meaning of selflessness that motherhood automatically teaches. And she knew the sheer joy this little one would bring into our lives.

Welcome to motherhood.

I mean it with all my heart.